February 2012
11 posts
It’s not that I want you anymore, or that I still wish that things were different. I just really want to forgot all of those nights that you were here and all the conversations and all those times when you used to make me feel important. Because the only way you make me feel now is worthless.
Whenever you see me I want someone to punch you incredibly hard in the chest. So you know what it feels like when you laugh in my face
I just want to stop crying. Or for at least to know why I’m upset
“don’t let me wake up tomorrow. please im begging you.”
You legitimately laugh in my face. Wow I feel great today.
i just don’t understand why i want so badly for you to just acknowledge my existence. just one word or a smile, anything ! its like i’m waiting so much now where ive got to the point where id rather feel nothing.
Hi was all I needed to be happy. Just hi. And you couldn’t even give me that
I’m forgetting your face
you came back in my dream last night. you knocked on my door so unexpected and told me that you missed talking to me everyday. i closed the door back on your face and somehow ended up in your room. you grabbed my arm and said “why do you hate me so much” things fell silent for a while and i replied with “you weren’t meant to just leave, and you weren’t meant to...
We talked for the first time in months lastnight. Something trivial and unimportant. But I dreamt about you lastnight and it didn’t hurt. It’s finally starting not to hurt
January 2012
16 posts
Do you know what it’s like to be that girl. The one who out of all her friends, not one single person has ever been interested in. The one who’s feelings are almost a joke and will never be reciprocated. I’m the girl who’s personality is beginning to fade and the friendship that once replaced the loneliness have now disappeared. I’m the girl who has never ever felt...
“Help”
“you weren’t meant to come back now. you were meant to ignore my existence...”
My chest felt like it was caving in on Saturday night.. Luckily I have the best bestfriend you could ever want
October 10 2010 , 466 days ago. Nothings changed
One day I’ll have enough courage to send you this message and I guess if your reading it than I have. If I could work up the courage to let it all out to make you understand how I felt to get it all off my chest once and for all because it’s holding me down so much. I need you to know that I’ve been waiting for so long. I wish that I could just send you this without it making...
I just want to yell in your face that I’m NOT inlove with you. So that we can go back to being friends. I really need us to talk.
I just want to yell in your face that I’m NOT inlove with you. So that we can go back to being friends. I really need us to talk.
It’s like I don’t know why we just stopped talking one day, like for no apparent reason we just stopped. I never really thought about why it’s like this. But I really wish it wasn’t. And pathetically I wait all the time for the day your going to just pop up and say that you miss talking to me, and that you have no idea why we stopped. I always think that you were just...
It’s like I just want someone to find me interesting. But they don’t. They never do
It’s like for some reason I think that if I act really happy and look like I’m having a really good time you’ll think I’m carefree. And if you see me like that enough, one of these you’ll care .
I have that sick nervous butterfly feeling right now, the one I get every time I see you .
I’m way past ready to let go. I have to just let go of you forever. I can’t keep dwelling on your presence I can’t keep hoping your going to be around the next corner. When those fireworks went off and you turned around and smiled at me. I couldnt control the tears, they just burst and I couldn’t control my emotion. I walked away , and I’m going to keep walking until...
December 2011
2 posts
I wanted so badly to just scream in your stupid fucking face. To just kick and scream and make you Hurt. Make you know what it feels like to feel worthless, to feel so insignificant that I honestly wanted to just die. I hated that. I hate it so much that you did that. Your hurt me.
Let’s pretend.
Pretend I’m your little sister. Pretend that she’s become attached to a guy because he used to treat her so well, he used to talk to her as if it was his favourite thing to do and when he’d see her it would be so easy, so simple an so effortless. And than pretend that boy decided to not speak to her anymore, to continuously make her feel as if she was worth...
November 2011
9 posts
What happens if I just don’t stop feeling like this for you, what happens if I just keep thinking about you day after day after day. What do I do if you just keep making me want you more and more. What am I meant to say when I say that little bit to much. And what do I do that day when I go that little bit too far
Is it fucked up in my head that I think that if I can’t have you ever, that being close with her is just as good. It’s fucked up.
My head just keeps reminding me how much of a fuckwit you are , but my heart won’t let go of the guy you used to be .
Get off facebook. Your at schoolies and your making me cry
Why the fuck do I let myself go to your house. Why the fuck do I sit and talk to your family for a solid two hours. Why do I let myself get into the position where I have to hear her say ” he talks about you all the time, how much of a great girl you are ” and than while that’s wearing off everyone starts discussing how flawless she is. Why the fuck do I put myself in these...
Was so so close to saying something lastnight. For some fucked up reason I just wanted the right to be upset
Barely took my eyes off you the whole ceremony, and now your gone.
Goodluck
You know that I like you. But yet the day before your graduate and leave forever you come up to me at work and say ” I’m gonna miss seeing you everyday”
Do you think it’s going to be easy for me. Do you not think that I look for you everywhere. Every single day I try to find you in a crowd. Do you not think it’s going to be hard to turn around and your never...
i hadnt spoken to you in a month, hadnt text you or even made any effort to say hi. you didnt go to school which helped and when you did i would go out of my way to avoid you. id made it nearly 5 weeks without a single word exchanged between us. and now your back , your every single where i turn. i was walking to class and you were just beside me even though the grade 12’s werent at school....
October 2011
10 posts
I always knew that you knew. Because of the things you’ve said and the way you’ve acted. But hearing it, blankly. Made things seem so much more pathetic. I hated it
“how can they possibly just go about their days, their weeks, their months. when...”
ive been numb for the last two days. i cant laugh, or smile or joke. i just go about my day as if nothing had ever happened and without emotion. its so much easier to just be numb. things seem simple. the only thing i cant figure out is why its fucking me up now when it was months ago?
No matter how much things fuck you up inside . You always get what you deserve always. I deserved what happened that night. I am dirty I will always be dirty
You didn’t say one word to me the entire night, you walked past me as if I was some sort of ghost. We would be in the same conversations and you wouldn’t bat an eye lid. Untill the very end when you decided to tell me my friends wouldn’t notice if I was hit by a bus. Sadly it was the highlight of my night.
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C
I just sent her a ‘C’ it seems inferior , but wow what a punch in the face
i actualy make myself sick. i have been sitting here all day and its actually discusting how i can do this. im tired of making excuses why its not bad, tired of saying that its different or that she wont be mad. i can honestly never ever call myself a good friend again. i am beneath horrible.
you called me lastnight, in the middle of the night when you were laying in bed by yourself, to make sure that i had gotten home okay. i told you i was just near your house and you said that you would come and pick me up and take me back to yours to stay. i cant explain the feeling that i felt, it was like in that split 5 minute conversation you actually cared about me. you were thinking about me....
i cannot understand how she can do things like this with people who mean nothing to her and not even think twice of people who will get hurt. being around him the only thing i hear is the people who will get hurt,.
September 2011
3 posts
I know that I’ve made myself feel like this, I know you haven’t done anything to purposelly make me hate everything about myself, to make me feel so not good enough for you that i compare myself to everyone I meet. It’s so clear that my friends think it’s pathetic, how caught up and how taken I am by you. But I can’t seem to let myself stop, I can’t seem to...
we were sitting in your room, in your bed and i couldnt stop shaking. my heart was racing about a million times a minute and i couldnt breathe. you actually make me feel ill.